I've always had a problem with this, check it out:
So a girlfriend and I were going to dinner with a couple of girls she met at work, as we arrived, to my surprise I was greeted with some stares. I initially ignored this because I thought it was normal as I am the new friend, however when I really sat down to observe the situation, I noticed that I was the only girl there with a weave, not just a weave weave, but A WEAVE!! u know 18 inches, with my banging curls!! Basically what I am sayin is that I had SUPERSTAR hair and these girls did not. My friend was rocking her real short, while the rest of the girls had natural hair, and the other a very low cut.
Now I taught to myself, Zar, your probably making this whole thing up. But just as I was about to shrug it off, one of the girls made a comment Blackness and Nappy-ness. Apparently the girl (mind u not an african!!!) felt like she was truly representative of black beauty by not succumbing to the pressures to look beauty according to white standards...blah blah blah
My reaction to her was this: "since when was black beauty all about Natural hair, and isn't it belittling to think that a race of people can be characterized under one feature"?
I am not against women with natural hair, I mean do YOU!! I have rocked all kinds of hair but I stay true to that which I think fits me well, and I will not change and do something that is not fitting all because someone sees it as UN-BLACK.
Who says that black woman can't naturally grow Hair down to their backs (em...ananda lewis). for goodness sakes I cannot maintain my natural hair to save myself (brushing the thing is impossible).
SO my message is this, whatever HAIR you're rocking, be happy with it and do you. If you u truly are happy being natural then that's fine, don't go breathing on other people's neck because they want to wear indian, chinese or horse (lol) hair. Is it going on ur head?
I am not a fan of Hair-Haters, and I appreciate it if you leave the comments to your self.
Phew, just thought I get that off my chest.
Black girl with her real hair, so it's possible people!!!
13 comments:
Hmmm, I know what you mean. I have seen that attitude swing both ways though.
I have natural hair and know that there are a lot of people who equate how you wear your hair to how 'authentic' or proud of ethnicity you are.
I have also seen many, many people with permed hair or weaves look at people with natural hair as crazy, unfashionable or totally uncool.
I believe to each their own, and agree with you, that people should wear what they like.
I did however notice that you mentioned that you had "superstar hair" and that the others did not. You also mentioned that the others were wearing naturals and a low cut. It made me wonder if you do not also unconsciously ascribe certain beauty standards to different types of hair. It's one thing for a person's hair to be untidy, not well made or not complementing their features, but it's quite another to not think their hair worthy of superstar status, because it's natural or a low cut.
Just my thoughts.
i second Ore...aaliyah's hair was also all hers as well!
I am loving the phrase 'superstar' hair however I do agree with the above comments relating to fellow sistas critisizing each others hair dos. Hair should enhance a lady's beauty, not the other way around. I love having different hair dos on, as long as I look respectable and confident. If a lady needs to wear her hair long, short, bald, with weave or with WEAVE, it shouldn't matter, as long as the carrier of the hair knows how to carry it.
@ore by superstar hair i meant "celebrity type hairstyles" u know the long mutiple curls and all dat shabang. i did not mean dat my hair was awesome.. it was basically tv hair.
- and am not against short natural hair cuz underneath my faux hair is dat.
- so just wanted to clear things.
great comments...Loved the post.... to me, the whole hairstyle thing is a matter of one's state of mind ....sometimes, you feel like rocking it short,long, natural,twist.....etc....as long as you feel comfortable with it..... go for it.. but remember people perceive things differently and they're entitled to their opinion....and they will always talk...so do you!
By the way Zar, I'm mad that my blog is not worthy of being listed on yours'
@ hair azara, ok, I get what you were saying
I KNOW RIGHT, THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH FIXING YOUR HAIR HOWEVER, I AM GLAD I AM NOT CRAZY, SOME PEOPLE CAN'T SEEM TO BREAK FREE OF LABELING THEMSELVES OR OTHERS.
QUICK QTS I AM LOOKING FOR VIRGIN INDIAN HAIR, WHAT SITE DO U RECOMMEND? THX
@SET for virgin indian hair, try:
http://www.inhairco.com/
http://www.remyhairtoday.com/
http://www.myindianhair.com/index.html
http://www.divastyles.com/
http://www.hairimporters.com/
THX. A FRIEND SUGGESTED INHAIRCO.COM I WANTED AMNOTHER SUGGESTION. THX
It's not secret non white women can grow their hair long, but the trend now is moving away from conforming to what white america defines as acceptable and moving back to embracing who we are and how we look naturally. My hair is all natural and when I press it, it hits the middle of my back and I get compliments because it's all my hair. Just my opinion, but everyone should work on making what they have better rather than trying to cover it up to fit in. But do you.
@Set: I don't know whether u are looking for weft hair or braiding hair. If weave hair checkout mywigsandweaves.com
@anonymous, I appreciate ur comment, and I appreciate your point of view, because it provides me with the perfect opportunity to express what my views concerning this issue.
I think alot of us express ourselves differently. For me I like to dress my hair, the way I dress my outfit, I have never really liked having my hair out, not because I am not proud of it but because I get bored. and for a while I thought it was just me, but one of my BFF has hair A.D.D as well. lol.
But for me my hairstyle expresses my mood for that time period, I change it all the time, and that is why I have done everything from having a low cut to braids, Hair dyes and many more.
I am passionate about hair, just like other people are passionate about clothing and have to have many outfits a day!
I also believe that this has very little to do with "acceptance" or white people but really the individual. It is a major highlight as a woman of color to have these many choices in Hair dressing. I have white friends that wish they could rock micro braids, or can do half of the thing we can do.
It is great that we grow our hair, for those that can, and I know the feeling of when you have great hair, but for those that don't have the genetics(I know a couple), it is not the end of the world.
LOL this is long, but I believe that alot of times, when we tell ourselves that we are reclaiming our black roots and identity, we are only limiting ourselves and our choices. Don't get me wrong, alot of things that our race does is still a result of being "conditioned" but alot others come from who we are as a people. Black authenticity is not defined by kinks, but by our "resilient" nature. What other race has that many skin color, and HAIR TEXTURE??? it is truly amazing.
So I hope you(and many others) understand where alot of extension wearers are coming from.
It is a blessing to have the hair texture that can be twisted, braided, relaxed, curled, and weaved. WOW! what more can I say?
*Thanks guys I really appreciate the comments, as you can see, this issue is dear to me.
I have just taken my braids off and read recently that i should condition my hair with a herbalblend cholesterol treatment before putting my hair back in braids. My stylist advised I steam it with cholesterol before I put it back in raids. Do I need the stress?
While I have seen long hair on black females, your examples are not 100% black. Ananda has native American(Indian) genes, Aaliyah was mixed somehow was she not?
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